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Women Empowering Women!

PW: During your tenure as a court reporter for the magistrates court in Detroit, what were the most common cases you saw regarding women and young girls?
I've seen so many cases, but the most frustrating were the domestic violence and criminal sexual conduct cases and the reason for that answer is because despite all the women or girls had been through they would never want to press charges against their abusers.

What if any commonalities did you identify in these women’s backgrounds?
I discovered that a woman’s lifestyle and childhood will often determine how she sees herself and the type of relationships she chooses. Many women had lost their sense of identity and lived in unstable environments or circumstances as a child and so found themselves repeating history. They had a lack of purpose and often defined themselves by what other people thought of/said to them. The stories I heard were always the same; despite the violence or molestation, they believed him when he said he would stop hurting them - and so they kept going back.

It's common for society to give up on people with repetitive behavioral patterns or those who seem to make bad choices time and again - what do you think leads to this endless cycle?
Well it usually is part of a long process of how they have been treated by others, what they believe about themselves and how they look at their situations. As it says in Prov23:7 "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he." (NKJV) So negative thinking can never produce a positive lifestyle - nothing can except a woman changing the way she thinks about herself.

How can women break bad lifestyle patterns?
After she changes the way she thinks, it's wise for a woman to change those she allows to speak over her life. This means, you will most likely have to change the group of people you associate with. After that I would recommend a woman get around the word of God, particularly Proverbs 31 and its also important to begin reading books that are spiritually empowering.

Tell us about your own book "Grasping for Sweet Things & finding Nothing"...
Well, I used to sit in court and listen to countless mothers arguing with their daughters, talking them down and telling them they should not be testifying and it used to make me feel so frustrated. I knew I wanted to reach out to them and try to empower them to make wise decisions for themselves - even and especially when it went against the grain of what others told them to do.

How can we motivate women and young girls to hope for a better future?
I would say by creating environments of empowerment and making resources available to them so that they can see with their own eyes, hear with their own ears and experience for themselves what another life (one that is violence and abuse-free) could actually be like...

Many women loose hope or lack the ability to hope, so they stay in negative circumstances, hoping they will somehow change. Why do you think they fail to transfer their hope for a change in the relationship to a hope for a better life?
I can't emphasize enough the importance of raising a child in a positive environment! Many of the women I see where raised in an environment surrounded by addiction, violence and a lack of spirituality, so when it comes to their turn, they end up recreating that way of life, because they have known no other. They can't hope for what they have never experienced or seen modeled before them. This is one of the things that badly affect the black community. We need to step in and get more involved in the change. When I began meeting girls after my speaking engagements, I started to see the necessity for a group that could do just that.

You are speaking of your new mentoring organization called 'G.E.A. Girls', tell us a little about it...
I knew I wanted to reach out into our neighborhoods and provide a safe place where girls can learn and explore all the options available to them. Where they could learn about growth, empowerment and action. So I've named it G.E.A. and the movement will be kicking off in 2009. We're dedicated to empowering girls in the areas of; spirituality, self-image, relationships & finances. Our aim is to help girls grow into women who are God fearing, wise in their decisions and able to triumph over obstacles in their lives!

It sounds like an exciting time for you...
I am very excited and can't wait to see what God will do through G.E.A. Already our workshops are proving successful and God will really be able to reach them through the mentoring services we're providing, too.

Well, we wish you every blessing for all your work with women!
Thank you so much. God bless you, too!

 

Jodi Matthews now works for the United States District Court. She is married to Vincent Matthews, husband of ten years and Pastor of the Peoples Community Church of Westland, where she serves as Director of their Women's Ministry . They have two beautiful daughters, Destiny Rachael & Jazmine Eve.

Jodi's book 'GRASPING FOR SWEET THINGS & FINDING NOTHiNG' (-Publisher: Xulon Press; ISBN-13: 9781591602828) can be ordered via her website or through Amazon.com.

For more information about Jodi' Matthews, please visit: